Posts Tagged ‘ abuse ’

Love Them With Your Hand

What you are about to read may be shocking, because I’m about to promote beating your children. Let me explain…

As a child, I kept it playful. I could play pranks, I could joke around. And as long as I didn’t get too out of hand, my parents let me have the freedom needed to become the (semi) well-rounded adult I feel I am today. But whenever I started getting crazy, they would beat me down.

Belts, spoons, landles, remotes, basically anything in the immediate radius that could be held. But in most cases, the hand would do.

I can remember instances where I would purposely knock something off a shelf at a grocery store or try to have a meltdown. When I did, I was greeted by “the secret pinch,” a technique my mom developed. If you acted out, mom would come close to you and pretend to be lovey-dovey when in reality she’s giving you one of the hardest pinches you’ve felt in your life. Or what about acting out while the parent is on the phone? My parents have another one in the playbook called “the look.” The scariest thing about the look is 1) how mom or dad would maintain complete control of the conversation while 2) giving you the meanest look possible. Even worse was the knowledge of impeding doom whenever that phone conversation ended. Don’t even get me started on the mind games they would play, like hanging a metal belt on the wall as a deterrent for bad behavior.

As someone who was disciplined, I can never understand why parents would allow their child to run over them. To get loud, disrespectful, and wreak havoc. I don’t even have kids and I already know that your kids should fear you, just a bit. And how do you build that fear? By giving them something to be afraid of. Giving your kid a good pop every once in a while doesn’t make you a child abuser, and it doesn’t mean you don’t love them.

You simply love them with your hand.